Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Trip to Puncak (DONE)

In the end I have to go. They can't find any replacement (Intan can't go) and the notice is too last minute. I won't be staying throughout the entire course (9 days) of the competition. I'll go home on Sunday. Gaah... I hate this. Maybe I can clear my mind in Puncak, though, the weather is much cleaner there and it has a cooler climate so I can probably think of it as a short holiday. I'll be staying in a safari hotel anyway...
I'm trying to look on the bright side of life, and convince myself that it's not so bad.
Okay. Must pack. Ciao.
(Gaah... can someone just punch me already... *sob *sob)
X-(

Trip to Puncak (FAILED)

Argh Argh Argh tomorrow I'm supposed to go to Puncak to LO the ISDC thingy WHY DID I AGREE TO THIS? It sounds really fun actually... I read the itinerary for the week of the competition... They've got a lot of interesting things planned... And I DO want to watch high school debaters fight among themselves. I want to go... IF things had not suddenly turned against me.

The status quo right now is: My head is burning with a fever (probably cause of 3 consecutive sleepless nights), my tooth aches, my ear is ringing (I think it's a follow-up of the SORE THROAT that I'm also sporting), and my heart is broken (Boohoohoo). Not to mention the TESTS we have next week that I would skip if I go to Puncak, the Anthropology extra credit due next Tuesday (which a. I really really need and b. I would not be able to complete and deliver if I go to Puncak), the french class that I would skip (yet again) if I go and the 2 days of TKHI is bound to tire me out even more. Aaaarghh... why do I like to make life difficult?

Everything will work out though... I hope. I told Tirza I couldn't LO. She'd probably NEVER forgive me. But I have no choice. If I leave for Puncak tomorrow, there would be NO life waiting for me when I return, only doom awaits.

That's why I'm certain that I made the right decision to not go to Puncak. My biggest mistake was to agree to it in the first place. Stupid me.

O h w e l l

G o o d n i g h t

In Healing

Another session of MPKT. I was strangely on time. There were nothing to do, as usual, so we ended up discussing our sociology assignment that’s due tomorrow. Me, Dyana and Arum were discussing whether the method used in the given intervention and research on a certain village is a qualitative or a quantitative one. Oh well. Still during MPKT, there was definitely PDA. Someone was Publicly Displaying his Affection to someone else, complete, uncut, uncensored. Aaaw. How sweet... It’s just a matter of time before it’s official, I’m sure. Honestly, why wait? Hmmm? Then we practised some moves for TKHI (my major’s orientation). The moves were so funny... and the songs... ah well let’s just say that on the 9th of December (TKHI day) I’m up for a Major Self Humiliation. At least it’ll be fun to watch. ;-D

The night before yesterday I was conferencing in MSN with some of my old friends from junior college. It was not as difficult as I thought it would be. I thought I’d feel like a complete loser if I ever talk to them again. But apparently I was just being paranoid. And... it’s definitely time to bury the hatchet, move on, get over it, or whatever you call it. Yanice said I haven’t tried my best. Yan and Jaq were really sweet about it and they helped me “orchestrated” the whole conference thingy but it was pretty much a failure coz of stupid technology getting in the way (computers should NEVER disconnect by themselves!). Anyway, I was just kidding myself, after that I immediately felt STUPID for sticking out for so long. Must have been overdue temporary insanity.

SO

Start a new clean slate. C’est la vie. I won’t fall into a mood as described in the song “Sympathie” that my french teacher used to play for us: “Je ne veux pas travailler; Je ne veux pas dejeuner; Je veux seulement oublier; et puis je fume...” (I don’t want to work, I don’t want to eat, I only want to forget, and then I’ll smoke... – SO DEPRESSING).

I’ll be just fineee

I think.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Monday, November 27, 2006

Missing Sing...

Beloved Hostel...




Today's debate training was cancelled. I am torn between a "Yay!" (coz I don't feel like arguing I just feel like sleeping) and a "But I've done so much research..." (coz I've burnt my head trying to remember the Arabic names of the people involved in Saddam Hussein's trial - they all sound similar...) But the point is, I can stay in my room and blog instead so I'm quite happy right now.

PIP was okay. Big lecture group today coz I think Wasabi didn’t feel like teaching and so he left us to combine with another lecture group. MPKT was fun. I was late. As usual. Gossip session. We were talking about how the saying "the grass is always greener on the other side" really applies to people in HI (my major, International Relations) and Politik (Political Science major). And Tyas was doing some kind of "research" to find out who are the most popular guy and girl in HI.

People in HI are, well, unique, I guess (another way of saying they're weird), although I love all of them... There's Tyas, for example, who can write seven pages of essay in MPKT and score full marks for sociology (damn smart right?) and yet she has an incurable addiction to taking photos (she's the worst camera addict ever) and hallucinates of having millions of fans (4,297,435 if I'm not mistaken) worshipping her. And then there's Keshia who has an absurd number of beaded necklaces in all shapes, sizes and colors, and has lately begun to wear matching bracelets as well. There's Syarip and Mario who base their friendship on insulting each other's physical shortcomings constantly (isn't it sweet?). There's Dyana who is really not a college student but an underground mob leader from Priok, she's just escaping from the authorities coz the police would never suspect a HI student to be a criminal. There's Sonie who takes pride in his polka dotted lungs (he's probably a natural born smoker). There's TB who is always deep in thoughts on how to divide his time between homework, playing playstation and saving the world as Spiderman. There's Deky who looks like Doraemon and brings Onigiri to school everyday and call me a "pampered, spoiled, rich kid" (So Not True). There's Dira who's been all over the world and has finally come to the conclusion that Yemen carrots are the best (I want to try one!). There's Freida who looks like a Malaysian, speaks like an American and yet share the same strong appetite for gossips as Indonesians. There's WillY who's just really bitchY and loves a Shanghai BabY. There's Fira who is like Time, meaning she can never stop moving. There's Della who might be seaweed (ganggang) in her previous life coz she plays one so well. There's Menwa who believes sincerely from the bottom of his heart that men are absolutely superior and women are absolutely inferior (wonderful character, yes?). There's Mutti who is really very quiet and never makes funny comments or questions or any disturbance whatsoever (this is an example of sarcasm). There's Anthony who never asks any questions in class, especially when the class is almost over and everyone just want to get out (another example of sarcasm). There's Jenny who seems quiet in class and yet unleashes her true, loud personality outside (kind of like in Drew Barrymore’s movie Doppelganger, just not that creepy). There's Agung who seems calm and quiet and yet causes many hearts outside HI to throb (heehee). There's Lovely (the name itself is strange enough) who has left her home and become a permanent resident of SBAL. There's Yere whose favorite pastime is making summaries (and sharing it with us before each quiz). There's Iam who was the richest man in Semarang and now he's here to conquer Jakarta. There's Moren who pranks people (miscalls their phones, touches their hair, screams in a funny accent etc.) during class. There's StevIE who brings Amanda's BrownIE and aspires to be a celebritIE. And twenty more interesting characters... (I'll write about it some other time...)

Lanxiu called today. It was 1 am in the US. She told me how people there are very ethnocentric, and they feel that they are truly THE superpower and the rest of the world owes them, hence they are entitled to do whatever they want. Sounds pretty fabulous to be an American then. I forgot to tell her how recently this week Bush came to Jakarta, and he was making such a fuss with all the protocols and preparations for his arrival (to the extent of destroying endangered lotuses in order to make room to build a new helipad for his landing), hence there were all sorts of protests going on and college students were marching on the streets in protest and there were all sorts of anti-Bush movements going on. Some say he was just being careful and taking all the necessary precautions in order to ensure his safety, but others think he was paranoid or was just being such a diva (like JLo when she absolutely must have her eyebrow shaper fly from New York to LA because her eyebrows desperately need trimming).

...the dogs won't stop barking downstairs for some reason or other. I have three dogs. It used to be two, then one of them got raped by a sleazy conniving little dachshund and gave birth to four puppies, then we gave two of the puppies and their mother to my neighbor and my sister's friend. So now there are only three dogs left. Nero, Baby, and Fluffy. I know, the names are cliché... Baby is a nickname by the way her real name is Banana. Okay never mind this is starting to sound weird. Oooh they've finally stopped barking. Peace and quiet. Maybe my sister's taking them for a walk. Nice.

What else did we talk about on the phone? Oh we were talking about Singapore and how we miss it a lot. At least in Jakarta we still have NYDC, Pastamania and La Mian Xiao Long Bao. She has to eat yucky western food everyday. She said American pastas suck. Talking to Lanxiu made me miss Singapore even more... I want to go to FarEast LevelOne and buy Shihlin Taiwanese Street Snack, I want a BurgerKing breakfast with hash browns, I want to shop at Wisma Atria TopShop, I want to browse for books at Borders, I want to watch choir concerts at Esplanade, I want to walk around in Clarke Quay, I want to shop at Cold Storage, I want to study at starbucks with a tall rhumba frapp (they don't make rhumbas anymore), I want to go to Body Shop sales at Suntec City, I want to eat the crepes and waffles at Marche in Heeren, I want IKEA meatballs... Gosh I'm such a drama queen.

Back to reality. Exams in twelve days!!! MUST STUDY in order to get a 4.0 (is that even remotely possible?) Oookay. TTFN.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Online

my friend's farewell party! I just downloaded the photo online... :)


New Internet Connection! FINALLY!!!

What to write? What to write? It's been a while since I actually OWN an internet connection... let's see... I think the last time was in 1997, when microsoft black-and-white comic chat was still cool. I used to e-mail this guy from Turkey who ended up working at NASA or something. He was my first friend online. The point is, I'm really psyched now that my internet connection is up and running and more importantly, it's MINE!! Mwahahahahaha... After years of sharing boarding school/ hostel internet I'm finally liberated!

They used to censor the internet at my boarding school so we can't really visit that many sites coz the MOE (Ministry of Education) were always sort of watching us. No, seriously. Once my friend S sent me, AS A PRANK, a picture of a certain tool that samantha from sex and the city liked to use (can't even say the name of the tool in case my little sister reads this... anyway it looked like a vacuum cleaner but not really), that were being sold on ebay or yahoo auction. It was a JOKE. But apparently the next day there were new flyers posted all over the notice boards in my boarding school saying, " Your Internet Connection is Being Monitored, please do not visit or access sites with.... blah blah blah etc etc". It's so embarassing that it's hilarious.

Anyway, enough reminiscing. Back to the topic. SO now I can research stuff, email people, use messenger (not right away really haven't downloaded it yet, tomorrow perhaps), blog, download programs, auction stuff, buy stuff, and do whatever I want online... Mwahahahahaha the sky is the limit!!!

Okay Enuff already. Must do research on Saddam Hussein's execution. Why? Tomorrow's IVED training debate motion is "This House Believes in the Execution of Saddam Hussein". Don't know yet whether I'm the affirmative or the negative. Capital punishment debate. Arrgh. I want to watch DVD or feed my fish or play suikoden or redecorate my room or whatever. Anything but work.

Okay JUST one more story. My weekend! So yesterday I finally went to CCF after skipping french classes for over a month (cause I've sold my soul to debating this month... :_-( oh well) and thankfully I can still understand what people were saying (although I stumbled and stuttered most of the time). After class I went to "le kioske", the french bookshop in kemang to trade my book prize voucher and bought myself (well not really coz I didn't pay) four french books (yippee) and one of them is called "Destination: Paris" HEEHEE so happy. Can't wait to go and try the stupid escargot.

I've decided on a tour. Among the sixteen packages they are offering for the prize there is one that appeal to me most... I've consulted J since she goes to her husband's country a few times each year so she must know France very well. There's this one package that offers a few days in Paris, and then I get to visit the Alps and the Cote d'Azur and stay at a holiday lodging/a homestay for a few days at the mountains and after that I would go down to the mediterranean cities and beaches and visit Monaco and Nice and all that. Waaaa can't wait can't wait. I hope the apocalypse won't come before July 22, my departure date. I can't die before I see Europe.

Gosh I sound so lame. Heehee. Back to my story. So after I went to the bookshop on Saturday we went for dinner at KemangFoodFest and I think I overinhaled a grape-flavored shisha coz my throat felt funny afterwards. But the food were nice. Watched "Scoop", the new Hugh Jackman movie - I swooned.

CONCLUSION : Initial plan to STUDY for end-of-semester exams FAILED MISERABLY.

I am going to study tonight, though. And tomorrow night. And the night after that. AMEN.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Wasted






It is done,
It is lost; and now there is none.
Reason returns from her walk in her park,
Abandons daydreams and castles in the sky.

Rubies of the past and strange pearls in corals,
Chains of chances and fates unmet,
Grim thoughts of tomorrow and yesterday's luck,
Forever now are treasures of the past.

Arriving quietly, my train stops at last.
And with the violent energy of martyrs and cowards
Welcomes the point of no return and sighs
The fuming hoards of this century's angst.

For it is done; it is lost; it has ended and now the curtain falls
And through the empty roads strange forms shall appear
Shadows eclipsed from the lost, distant years;
Missed chances and failed ideals shall roam the rivers
and bleak countenance in every man's freight.

Will they ever know?
Will they ever notice?
Will they see the signs?
When it is too late when it is lost when all is done
And the only thing that is coming is
The lingering regret of one's wasted time.